This is Me

JaredIn today’s Blog Post, I will give you a deeper look of myself, the man, the myth, the legend known as Jared J. Gober. A lot of you know me, but don’t really know the real me.

If you have followed this Blog from Day 1, then you already know the basic information about me. For those that do not, I’ll keep it brief, because most of this information is located on my about page. If you would like a quick snapshot of me here’s the link: My given name is Jared J. Gober and I was born on March 8, 1980 in Tampa, Florida. Due to my father being in the military we moved around a lot. He was a Bell UH-1 Iroquois Crew Chief, unofficially called a Huey. I don’t have many memories from the early days of my childhood. Sometimes I think that it’s a good thing, because while my parents were married, my father spent a lot of time outside the home. From countless conversations with my mother and other members of my family, he used to come home drunk and beat my mother. I’ve already done a post of my feelings toward him. It is located here:

My parents filed for divorce while we were stationed at Fort Benning, Georgia. At this point my father was living in the Barracks, due to the amount of times the police would had to come to our trailer we lived in which just so happened to be located off of the infamous Victory Drive. If you’re not familiar with the area, google it or if you have friends that are in the military and they have been stationed at Benning, ask them about it. After the divorce was final, my lovely father would pay child support when he felt like it, so my mother did whatever she had to do to make ends meet. That is one of the many reasons why I have a lot of resentment towards him. If he really cared about the welfare of his children then he would have done the right thing. I strive every single day to be a better man than he ever was. There is no drug, female or any other atrocity that has the ability to destroy a marriage and family, that I would choose over my wife and family. Growing up, my mother was very hard on me and my oldest sister, because she didn’t want us to show any behavior that reminded her of him.

Putting myself in her shoes, I sure I would have done the same thing. Because my mother didn’t have a full time job and my father paying child support when he felt like it, we had to move to a housing project on Baker Jared 2
Plaza Drive called EJ Knight Apartments. This housing project wasn’t that bad, but in order for my mother to be able to immediately move in, she had to settle for a 2 bedroom apartment. My brother and I shared a bed and my sister had her own twin bed. In order to play with toys, we had to store them in the storage shed located right next to our apartment. The downside to living in the EJ Knight Housing Project, it was located right across the street from the infamous Baker Village. The norm to living across from Baker Village, the Columbus PD and Ambulance were there almost every night due to a fight, shooting or someone being stabbed. The school we attended was located right up the street from the EJ Knight housing project, so walking to and from school was safe, because the Police presence was heavy. My mother didn’t mind us playing outside, but we had to be inside before the street lights came on, which was right before dusk.

It seemed every year, the crime rate would rise. My mother did have a gun (I don’t know if it was legal or not, I didn’t ask questions!), so if someone knocked at the door at night and she wasn’t expecting  anyone, the first thing the person would see was the barrel of the gun. She got tired of living like this and said that she wanted to move back home to the great state of Alabama, in the greatest city known as Enterprise. When she made the decision to move she called my Uncle, Aunt and Grandmother and they all came up, rented a U-Haul and loaded all of our belongings. My mother didn’t tell my father that we were moving, because she didn’t want him to find us. The awesome thing about moving, my mother had already found and placed a deposit for a place to move in immediately. We moved in Meadow Brook Apartment and Townhouses. This place was twice the size of the apartment we lived in while in Columbus. It was a 2 Story, 3 bedroom with a Washing Machine and Dryer hook up. While in Columbus, we always had to lug our clothes to the laundry mat located right up the street from our apartment, so having the ability to do laundry at home was awesome. Compared to the place we left, our new home seemed like a mansion. My sister currently lives in the same building, but a different Townhouse. Whenever I have the chance to visit, I’m shocked to see how small it is; however, while growing up this was our “little mansion!”

Growing up in the Great City of Enterprise, a lot different from Columbus, it was slower and not as built up as Columbus was. We did get used to the slower pace and adjusted quite quickly. My Grandmother worked at the Central Issue Facility (CIF) located on Fort Rucker, which is the Home of Army Aviation. I was fascinated with helicopters and every time I was asked what I wanted to be, I would always say a Blackhawk Helicopter Pilot. One thing I can say is that the education curriculum was a lot different so we had to play catch up, because we were so behind the rest of our peers. Growing up in Enterprise, my sister and I were sheltered. It was crazy. I wasn’t allowed to have a girlfriend or even talk to them on the phone. Once I got to High School, I did find a girlfriend, but I had to hide it. She was in the band and a memory I will never forget, it was after a football and as we walked to the band room, we held hands. Once I arrived to the band room, I put my tuba up and waited for my girlfriend. We then walked out of the band room together, I gave her a hug and a kiss, but guess who was in the parking lot waiting for me? My Aunt and Mother. My mother asked who she was and I said she was just a friend. Immediately, they both stated that friends don’t kiss each other.

Jared 1Whenever we got in trouble, our punishment was calling my uncle. He came over that following day, which was a Saturday, he and I walked outside, sat down on the steps in front of our Townhouse and he asked me how long her and I had been “courting” and I told him that we had been girlfriend and boyfriend for approximately 5 months. He asked me why I was hiding it so I told him that if my mother found out she would give me a whipping. Yes, I received whippings until the day I left for basic training. After our conversation, we walked inside and my Uncle called my mother into the living room, we all sat down and my Uncle and asked my mother why can I have a girlfriend? She said she was ready to be a Grandmother. In front of my mother, he asked if I was having sex and I said no, which was the truth. I didn’t lose my virginity until I was 19 while I was in Advanced Individual Training (AIT). After talking to my mother, she reluctantly said that she would allow me to have a girlfriend, but if I was having sex and my girlfriend became pregnant, she would kick me out of the house. She then stated that she didn’t like the fact my girlfriend lived right across the street from the band practice field. This is something that I never told my mother, but I would go to her house after school during marching season, because it was easier than going all the way home, then it would take nearly calling the President for me to get a ride back to band practice, because we didn’t have a car. You might not believe me, but I can truthfully say, the closest we came to having sex, was making out, hunching and touching each others goods.

I realize today’s post is quite lengthly, but I felt in order to let you in on another piece of my life, this was the only way. My goal with my girls is to not be as strict as my mother was on me and my wife feels the same, because during her childhood and growing into a teenager, it was very turbulent. Just because we aren’t a strict as our parents were, doesn’t mean that we allow them to do what they want. We love our girls to death and are willing to go through hell and high-water to make sure they have what they need and they are taken care of. Our first priority, as far as our children goes, is their needs. They are very well behaved and it doesn’t take us being like our parents to instill traits such as integrity, moral courage and hard work. We have our challenges, but we get through this together, as a family. Maybe if my parents would have stayed together and my father had put his family as his first priority, maybe my life would have been a lot different. Who knows?

I didn’t mean to bombard you with all this information to bore you and put you to sleep, but I wanted to give you a no bullshit look into my life. I hope that I accomplished that. If not and you have some constructive Blackhawk Jaredcriticism and I open to whatever your suggestion is. Again, THIS IS ME, THE LEADER OF THE REGULARS.





When will we as Americans start to recognize each other as Americans instead of a Social Class, Race, Ethnicity or any other category you can dream up? From what I’ve seen, the only time the United States becomes “United,” it takes a major event such as a terrorist attack, to happen on our front porch. It’s very frustrating to hear people from all walks of life complain about how this race/ethnicity is this way or a certain religion is bad because of this or that. Instead, how about we say, we as Americans have all types of issues, what can be done to fix them? Whether you believe it or not, or are willing to accept it, we are all Americans. Yes, I know there are those that are American through a process of paperwork and not by birthright, but why are we all treated differently?

A lot of individuals are willing to sacrifice their lives just to escape one way of living so they can achieve the “American Dream,” meaning, they want what seems to be a better life and also have the right to be able to make their own decisions and so forth. I also realize that there are a large number of illegal immigrants in America (Different Topic). I am not going to sit here and tell you that at some point in my life that I have never been prejudice against another race or religion of certain people because of an irreversible act of Terrorism. I will admit and I am not ashamed to say that after the individuals that were responsible for the attacks on the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001, and they were identified that I contained a strong hate for people of the Middle-Eastern Decent/Muslim faith. That is a very ignorant way of thinking, I know, but I wasn’t or didn’t want to be educated at the time, because I thought it was the right thing to do. It took me having to be deployed to Iraq/Afghanistan and forced to interact with some common individuals in those countries to realize that you can’t blame an entire religion or a group of people because they have a couple of “misguided” children. I won’t take all the blame for this hatred either, some of that hate can be attributed to the way the media portrayed these people at that time. It took me to see with my own eyes there are people in these countries that don’t have a radical way of thinking and they don’t wake up everyday with the thought of killing Americans or Foreign Troops on their mind.

America has come a long way since the days of slavery and segregation, but there is still a large number of ethnic groups (not just Black) who think that they are owed something by White Americans. I didn’t realize these ethnic groups are being forced to America in large numbers, packed to the brim of a ship for months on end with barely enough food and water; I didn’t realize these ethnic groups are still being beat up, attacked by dogs, deterred by the National Guard because they want to attend a certain University for higher learning. I understand what individuals in that era had to endure and I am not saying forget about it, how about we honor those individuals by coming together, so as they look down on us, they will be able to say, “I now understand why I had to endure pain and suffering; so the future America doesn’t have to.” It’s no longer a Race, Ethnic or Social Class thing, it’s an America thing. We all struggle with the lack of proper education, lack of motivation to get a job, lack of respect for our elders, lack of regard for law enforcement/authority in general, etc. I could go on, but what is that going to do other than make you wish that I would shut up? Instead of segregating a certain race or ethnic group, how about we work together as 1 group, Americans, and tackle this problem together. If we continue to separate ourselves, this process will happen continuously.

That also rings true when we set out to the polls to elect our officials of Government, whether it be City, County, State or Federal Levels. If we as Americans are not taking advantage of our right to vote and are voting for the right reasons then it’s our fault that the individual we elect does not meet the expectations set forth. I honestly think, no matter which party is in control, someone, somewhere is still going to complain. Its very hard to make everyone happy. I’m sure not many Black Americans will admit to this, but I didn’t vote for President Barak Obama solely because he was black, I voted for him in the 2008 Presidential Election, because I thought he was going to finally get this country back on track. I had hope and believed in what he said. It’s now 2014 and it feels like we are “marching in place,” because the same individuals we elected (The House, Senate and Congress) seem to want to pacify the rest of the world instead of making sure the people in its country are taken care of, but that’s a whole different issue. Don’t get me wrong, I do understand we have to uphold our foreign relations, because that’s just how it works, but I don’t agree with making another country happy with the sacrifice of innocent men and women. (That’s an entirely different issue; don’t get me going!)

In order for America to fix itself, we as Americans need to stop thinking of “self “and start thinking of “us.” There is a small percentage of individuals that have my way of thinking and I am sure any changes of this magnitude will not be seen in my lifetime, hopefully for my children. Maybe they will get it right. There are going to be those that read this and will be able to take bits and pieces from this; it’s a start. Now only if we could get our elected officials on the same page. Its time for America to take back America and stop letting an individual think for us. We all know what we want, we just need to stop depending on someone else to try to figure out what it is.