It’s taken me my whole life to feel this comfortable to tell you this.  So here it goes, why did you leave?  Was I not good enough?  Not the boy you wanted me to turn out to be?  Well guess what?  Its taken every damn breath in my body to say I Forgive you.  Because you never taught me anything, I learned how to do what was needed to be done on my own.  I strive every fucking day NOT to be like you!  It sucks that I can’t tell you this to your face, but this is the best way for me to get this shit off my chest.  When I needed you, you were some where in the United States shacking up with some woman.  I strive everyday to be a better man than you.  You know how many nights I cried because I missed you?  No you don’t, because you didn’t give a shit!!  It’s all good now.  I’m showing you how to be a man.  You know, I’m a man now, but the shit still fucking hurts! But, I am now man enough to forgive and forget. I know you will never ever see this, one day I’ll be able to say all this to your face.  I’m the type of man that doesn’t run from his problems.  I man up and handle mine.  To say I love you is hard.  You didn’t teach me how to do that.  You showed me how to bang on a woman and cuss her out, but that’s not Jared J. Gober.  This guy here, is a proud family man, that wouldn’t put a hand on his queen. You are something else.  One day, everything will be lined up and we will be face to face to get this out.  I can’t hold it any longer.  Holding on to it is only making me a bad father, no no, not me!!  All I want from you is for you to man up and be real with me.  No Bullshit! No Lies!! That’s it.



5 thoughts on “VI

  1. I love u cuzzo!! And I’m proud of you for the man you have become! Continue to be the best u can and know that all the things you’ve endured in your life shaped you into the MAN u are!! Love u, Angie, and those beautiful lil ladies!!!

    1. I love you too cuzzo. You’re a strong woman. I’ve learned a lot from you and the situations you’ve been through. Continue to be who you are and good things will continue to come your way. You are more than my cousin, you’re my sister! Thank you for all the support you’ve given me thus far. It really means a lot.

  2. Reblogged this on THE REGULARS and commented:

    Nothing has changed the way I feel. I feel the need to re-post this, because I’m sure there are a lot of men that would like to confront this beast, but don’t know how to.

    This worked for me, hopefully if there are those that don’t know how to say it, I hope this helps.

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